"We love those who have seen the worst of us and do not turn away." Oscar Wilde
I saw this quote on an IM profile and it rings true, at least in my life. I believe that trust and fear are constantly battling one another; you choose which will win. There have been many times in my relationship with Chris where I have taken a risk and chosen to trust him with some part of me that no one had ever seen or that had been wounded in the past. He never once ran away; he did not even threaten to. He has stood by my side and I know that he will continue to do so for the rest of our lives. I love him with all that I am.
Sunday, September 18, 2005
Thursday, September 15, 2005
William the Super Monkey and Other Thoughts
-I have a stuffed animal that Chris gave me on our one year anniversary. He's a monkey who's name is William. He has a blue bandana he wears as a cape. He's a super monkey. I love him very much. He is one of the best gifts I have ever received.
-I would like to give a shout-out to everyone who worked at Seesalt this summer! I love you all and hope to see you all soon! :)
-I talked to Lauren today, she is such a beautiful person. I love her dearly.
-The world of car insurance is insanely difficult to navigate. I understand it's necessary, but that doesn't make it any easier to get.
-The job hunt is still a hunt. I found a job that I'm really interested in, however, it's for an organization that is heavily involved in the Katrina relief efforts, so they have put hiring on the back burner. I called earlier this week and they should be looking over resumes and applications at the beginning of next week. Hopefully something positive, like an interview, will come of this. Also, you are only "unemployed" if you do not have a job but are actively searching for one.
-Last night, Chris was studying for a test and I walked back to the bedroom. He asked if I was going to watch tv. I told him I was going to talk to Jesus, to which he replied, "Even better." Then I said, "Wouldn't it be cool if Jesus were on tv? What show would He be on?" Chris said He'd be a carpenter on Trading Spaces. Then I said, "No! He'd be the carpenter on Clean Sweep!" (For those of you who have no idea what any of this means, check out www.tlc.com. On Clean Sweep, an organizer, a designer, and a carpenter come together and clean out cluttered, dirty rooms and make them over. Now do you see why Jesus would be on that show?)
-Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life. (Proverbs 4:23)
I had read this verse many times in my life, but I did not heed it's advice until I was in college. I did not know what it meant to guard your heart; I did not truly understand what this meant. All I knew was that my heart had been hurt, and that was why I guarded it. Looking back, knowing what I know, if I had guarded my heart from the beginning, I would have spared mself a lot of pain. Unfortunately I see so many women who do not guard their hearts, but who wear thier hearts on their sleeves and freely give them to whatever man comes along and says the right thing. I know this because I did it. I am the first to acknowledge that there are some truly amazing men in this world, but they are not deserving of my heart. I have friends who are dating some great men, mne who love the Lord, but those men are not deserving of a girl's heart. I have friends who only guard their hearts for a small portion of the relationship but who freely give their hearts away when talk of marriage enters the picture. As women, we must guard our hearts in the way we act phsyically but also in the emotional aspects of our relationships. For example, I know many young women who talk like this: "When we get married . . ." I hear that phrase and see no engagement ring and ask if they are engaged and they are not. The problem with this phrase is that it involves and envokes so many emotions and sets expectations so high in a woman's mind. I know they think he is "Mr. Right" and is the man of their dreams and all that, but the reality is that what these women think might happen in the future (i.e., a wedding) may not happen. We, as humans, are not even guaranteed tomorrow, how we can believe something that may or may not happen what could be years down the road. I'm not sure if all this is making sense, but I hope that what you gain from reading this portion of my blog is that guarding your heart, ladies, is something that must be done until you walk down the aisle on your wedding day and say "I do." I just finished walking down the aisle (almost 6 weeks ago) and on that day I was able to take what God had given me (my heart) and give it to my husband. God had taken my heart and allowed it to heal; He took good care of it. It never belonged to me; it was never mine to give away in the first place. And when my wedding day came, God allowed me to give my heart to my husband, and both he and I were grateful that I had guarded it.
-I would like to give a shout-out to everyone who worked at Seesalt this summer! I love you all and hope to see you all soon! :)
-I talked to Lauren today, she is such a beautiful person. I love her dearly.
-The world of car insurance is insanely difficult to navigate. I understand it's necessary, but that doesn't make it any easier to get.
-The job hunt is still a hunt. I found a job that I'm really interested in, however, it's for an organization that is heavily involved in the Katrina relief efforts, so they have put hiring on the back burner. I called earlier this week and they should be looking over resumes and applications at the beginning of next week. Hopefully something positive, like an interview, will come of this. Also, you are only "unemployed" if you do not have a job but are actively searching for one.
-Last night, Chris was studying for a test and I walked back to the bedroom. He asked if I was going to watch tv. I told him I was going to talk to Jesus, to which he replied, "Even better." Then I said, "Wouldn't it be cool if Jesus were on tv? What show would He be on?" Chris said He'd be a carpenter on Trading Spaces. Then I said, "No! He'd be the carpenter on Clean Sweep!" (For those of you who have no idea what any of this means, check out www.tlc.com. On Clean Sweep, an organizer, a designer, and a carpenter come together and clean out cluttered, dirty rooms and make them over. Now do you see why Jesus would be on that show?)
-Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life. (Proverbs 4:23)
I had read this verse many times in my life, but I did not heed it's advice until I was in college. I did not know what it meant to guard your heart; I did not truly understand what this meant. All I knew was that my heart had been hurt, and that was why I guarded it. Looking back, knowing what I know, if I had guarded my heart from the beginning, I would have spared mself a lot of pain. Unfortunately I see so many women who do not guard their hearts, but who wear thier hearts on their sleeves and freely give them to whatever man comes along and says the right thing. I know this because I did it. I am the first to acknowledge that there are some truly amazing men in this world, but they are not deserving of my heart. I have friends who are dating some great men, mne who love the Lord, but those men are not deserving of a girl's heart. I have friends who only guard their hearts for a small portion of the relationship but who freely give their hearts away when talk of marriage enters the picture. As women, we must guard our hearts in the way we act phsyically but also in the emotional aspects of our relationships. For example, I know many young women who talk like this: "When we get married . . ." I hear that phrase and see no engagement ring and ask if they are engaged and they are not. The problem with this phrase is that it involves and envokes so many emotions and sets expectations so high in a woman's mind. I know they think he is "Mr. Right" and is the man of their dreams and all that, but the reality is that what these women think might happen in the future (i.e., a wedding) may not happen. We, as humans, are not even guaranteed tomorrow, how we can believe something that may or may not happen what could be years down the road. I'm not sure if all this is making sense, but I hope that what you gain from reading this portion of my blog is that guarding your heart, ladies, is something that must be done until you walk down the aisle on your wedding day and say "I do." I just finished walking down the aisle (almost 6 weeks ago) and on that day I was able to take what God had given me (my heart) and give it to my husband. God had taken my heart and allowed it to heal; He took good care of it. It never belonged to me; it was never mine to give away in the first place. And when my wedding day came, God allowed me to give my heart to my husband, and both he and I were grateful that I had guarded it.
Monday, September 12, 2005
Scrambled Eggs for Dinner
Chris (my husband) is in class until late tonight so I'm on my own for dinner. After watching the premiere of "Martha" (Martha Stewart's talk show on TLC) I decided to make scrambled eggs for dinner. I have made many a scrambled egg in my 22 years, but never over the stove. My family makes them in the microwave, which is apparently something that no one else does . . . I added two types of cheese and ham and my eggs were delicious! Success!
I also spent a large portion of today looking for a job . . . I've talked with the Division of Family and Children's Services (DFCS) and hopefully that will pan out. I'm not too stressed about it, which is a good thing. I will find a job and it will pay money, but what the job will be and when I will start are both unknowns. I must trust God to take care of me and to put me exactly where He wants me to be. If only it was that easy . . .
I also spent a large portion of today looking for a job . . . I've talked with the Division of Family and Children's Services (DFCS) and hopefully that will pan out. I'm not too stressed about it, which is a good thing. I will find a job and it will pay money, but what the job will be and when I will start are both unknowns. I must trust God to take care of me and to put me exactly where He wants me to be. If only it was that easy . . .
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